The things nobody tells you.....

about running a marathon......well actually about preparing to run a marathon.  29 days out, things to know:
1.  Paranoia - alive and well, deeply fearful about getting injured.  Every little tweak, odd new pain or ache sends the mind into a spiral of "what if this is really bad".  Not at all helped this week by Zoe having discovered she can't run the Nike Women's Marathon two weeks from now (and she has been insanely training for it and we ran 20 miles together a few weeks back) because she has a stress fracture in her foot.  Stress fractures are special badges of honour.....they mean you have been training hard.....too hard and they are scary and they are common among "novice" runners training for marathons.  Deep breathes, breathing in and out!  Zoe chose a different training regime from me, she is an icon and she is tough, she is two weeks out, I am four.....
2.  Anticipation - mine, and others.  Okay so I'm my own worst enemy on this one.  Of course I'm anticipating it but I enrolled a whole bunch of folks in this as well....talked/talking about it obsessively etc etc etc.  Well now everyone is anticipating; it's good and it's weird and and and
3.  Fear - blood curdling cold fear.  Although I'm not sure what of.  Frankly I think I'm more scared of not being able to run it than actually running it!  See point 1.
4.  Surprise - ummm yeah, this "thing" might actually be going to happen.  Seriously, I remember the day I thought "I can do that, I'm going to do that".  December 2009 (not that long ago), sat in the cottage having read Ultra Marathon Man and decided "...if he can do that then I can do this.....".  No one close by to say "wtf?", instead everyone said "okaaaaaay, then go for it" or variations on a theme.  One notable "well, that's ambitious..".  September 2009 it took me an hour to run 5 miles / 4 kms.....and it seriously seriously hurt. Tomorrow I run 22 miles / 32 km....and I will feel exactly the degree of hurt I felt when I ran that first 5 miles (maybe more)......understanding that is totally weird.
5.  Elation - I might actually pull this off.  This not unlike how I felt immigrating to the US.
6.  Finally, over it - over thinking about it, focusing on it, being angsty about it, worrying about it, anticipating it, wanting it, dreaming about it, feeling guilty about not training or not training hard enough or drinking or eating the wrong things.......ready. to. run. now.